Yesterday was a snow day. A snows so much you are trapped in your house day. It was nice being able to stay home with the MIT. Not needing to go out. Not needing to open the door. Not needing to do anything but sit in the house, in front of the TV, watching holiday shows and basking in the glow from the decorated tree. i love snow days. i can hide with out having to come up with an excuse to hide. So i hid.
Today i feel like i want to hide, but i feel the need to get things done. i am trying to figure out what to do. i did the laundry yesterday. i have dusted already. i think wrapping gifts would be a good idea. i think baking would be a good idea. Then, i think how much i don't want to do anything.
Later today i am going with P&E, along with D to their family party. It should be a different experience. A little insight given to me by E means i am going to have to be prim and proper for the party. i know what i am going to wear. i know how i am going to do my hair. i even know that i will be taking some meds to keep me calm and relaxed. i am going to be doing everything i can not to embarrass my friends. i will be on my best behaviour. Yes i am a little stressed over it. At least, i am told, i will have a good meal, and time with P&E and D. That i am looking forward to.
i am not invited to the Yule party being put on by L&d. D wants me there. She kept inviting me, and telling me it is silly for me not to be there, and she wants me there, so i will be there. i am not going. Not even for D. i can't. That friendship, with L&d, is gone.
(i just wrote a whole section on what happened with L&d, but have decided it is best to be put in a separate entry.)
So that is how i am feeling. Confused. Hyper. Depressed. Weird.
(Photos of the snow)
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