Sitting and dwelling, and venting

i am sitting here, listening to the sound of the computer hum, and realize there are so many things i want to do.

• i want to start and herb garden in the spring
• i want to buy books on wicca, herbs, and oils
• i want to paint my bathroom
• i want to repot many of my plants as they outgrow their smaller pots
• i want to get a freezer, and actually be able to stock-up on food
• i want to get a Nintendo DS, a Wii, and games, for the MIT for His birthday
• i want to start making things to give people during special occassions

Then i look at my bank account. All i see are little numbers. There are so many things i want to do, but nothing to do them with. Heck, this week i have only enought for tampons (really needed) and waffles for the MIT. After that, nothing for the week after. All that with no money coming in until the 20th. Forget me getting smokes or pop, or anything else that is needed in the house over the next 11 days. At least i have enough bread and ham in the house to be able to send Him to school with lunches.

i am even starting to look around the house for stuff to sell. Yes it is that bad. If only i could get a client, a paying client, booked. Ok, a couple of paying clients. God that would be nice. When will this happen for me?